


Burnt Out

by ALPHAwolf



Series: OC Drabble [4]
Category: Black Books (TV)
Genre: Bi Bernard, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Pillow Talk, Sexual Content, drunks being drunk, impled smut, opening up over wine, slight crack (like the show)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-09
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-10-07 06:55:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17361140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALPHAwolf/pseuds/ALPHAwolf
Summary: An old flame drops in to Bernard’s book shop.





	1. Chapter 1

“ _Stop moving the books!_ I like the books where they are!” Bernard’s aggravated yelling filled the little London book shop, his single employee standing by one of the many bookshelves with his arms full of hardbacks.

“But nothing’s alphabetised, no one can find anything!” The shorter man implored, having been in the middle of sorting the fantasy section.

“I like it that way it confuses the customers!” Of which there was currently none. They tended to clear off pretty quick once Bernard started spewing his usual drunken abuse. Manny just sighed, rolling his eyes and removing the books he had just set in place as his flatmate continued to yell. It was only when the store suddenly went eerily silent he stopped, turning to look at his boss.

Bernard had gone rigid, staring wide eyed at the front of the shop. Manny followed his gaze curiously, realising in the noise he hadn’t noticed a customer walk in and start calmly browsing. He payed them no heed as Manny turned back to his boss, finding the man had begun to slowly sink down under his desk.

“Bernard?” Suddenly the Irishman dove for the curtains behind him, multiple crashes following as he no doubt tumbled into the awaiting mess on the other side. Manny cringed as the sounds continued (Bernard must have triggered a domino effect) and turned to give the tall customer an awkward smile, the man looking towards the drapes with a raised brow. Figuring it was safe to leave the gentleman alone for just a moment Manny left the books in his arms on a nearby table and hurried after the other to make sure he was okay.

He was _almost_ shocked at the disaster that greeted him on the other side. The table appeared to have been tipped on it’s side, any dishes that had been on it now shattered on the ground. He must have tripped over the couch next, because the coffee table had been knocked over and lost a leg. Most concerning of all Bernard was no where to be seen among the havoc.

“Bernard? _Bernard!?_ ” Manny whispered harshly, lifting up things and looking behind the couch as he searched. He finally found the alcoholic hiding behind the TV set, trying to appear casual as he sat hunched on the floor. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing.” The other lied as nonchalantly as he could, his voice just a little higher than usual. “You just go-go take care of the shop I’ve some... business to attend to.”

“Behind the TV?”

“ _Yes_.” Manny rose his eyebrows but didn’t see the point in pressing further, doing as he had been asked and returning to watch over the shopfront.

The customer was still there when he returned, searching through the bookshelves. There didn’t seem to be anything strange about him that he could image would cause Barnard to react the way he had. He didn’t look like a loan shark or a mobster in the least. He was well groomed with short dark hair, closely shaven and well dressed. His pants were perhaps a little tighter than Manny would find comfortable, but other than that he looked just like any other book shop browser. Well, certainly more attractive than the average, with extremely vibrant forest green eyes, but he couldn’t see reason for either of these characteristics causing his friend such panic.

The gentleman seemed to find a book he was happy with and came to the till, giving Manny a small smile (perhaps a little forced) as he purchased it before leaving without a word.

It wasn’t till the door clicked shut Bernard’s messy mop of black peeked in from behind the curtain. Once he saw the shop was indeed empty he tentatively stepped out from the back and gave a small relieved sigh, attempting to relax back into his chair. He pointedly ignored Manny’s befuddled expression.

“What was that all about?” Bernard looked around and fidgeted before looking up at the other, feigning ignorance.

“Hm? What was what about?”

“That with the-”

“My God Manny we don’t have time for your _delusions_! We’re trying to run a business here! Now go alphabetise everything!” He suddenly cawed, grabbing out a fresh cigarette.

“But- but before you said-” Manny ducked just as a small book was suddenly thrown his way.

“I know what I said now back to work, useless freeloader!”

 

§

 

Fran dropped by in the afternoon following another failed job interview with _lots_ of wine. They shut the shop a little earlier than usual and sat around as they so often did, drinking and smoking their cares away.

“You’re rather quiet this afternoon, Bernard.” Fran observed through the cloud of pollution they had created.

“Finally, he’s been in a right mood all day! Yelling and throwing stuff at me non-stop!” Manny complained, taking another sip of his drink.

“Awwwww, going through the motions?” She teased, refilling her glass.

“Shut up, he brought it all on himself.” Manny stared back at him in disbelief.

“I brought it on- _me_!? It wasn’t my fault you started acting all jumpy after that customer came in!”

“Ooooo, customer what customer?”

“Nothing- it’s nothing they were no one-” Bernard insisted as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat, but Manny had already begun describing the visitor.

“Tall, dark, rather handsome. Bought a copy of Dorian Grey. Bernard hid the second he came into the shop.” Fran looked extremely intrigued by the short retelling of events, her gaze turning slowly to the fidgeting Irishman.

“Tall dark and handsome huh?” She let her words hang in the air, pinning him down with her stare and taking a long drag of her smoke as she watched him squirm. “So tell us Bernard, who was he?” The man remained stubbornly silent as the two stared at him in wait. It didn’t take long for his resolve to collapsed under the weight of their gazes.

“Fine, Manny.” At the command his live-in refilled his held out glass with cheap wine, Bernard downing the whole thing in a few gulps in hope it would make it a little easier to talk.

“His name is Thomas, and he was a friend of mine back in university.” The two’s eyes lit up with delight at the tidbit, sitting on the edge of their seats with clawing interest. Manny refilled his cup again as they waited in silence for him to continue divulging more information. Bernard sighed in defeat and took a sip from his glass. “We studied Literature together. We were... close. Had a... thing.” He struggled to explain the nature of their connection, waving his hand about as if shoeing a particularly persistent insect.

“You dated?” Fran offered curiously.

“Not exactly. It was more like...” God why it was so hard to explain?! “this unyielding _hunger_ \- a-a burning passion that would set us both aflame!” The two watched in rapture as his wine sloshed about as he tried to express himself. “We were like rabid animals in heat the moment we entered the same room! Sometimes they’d have to physically throw us out of the lecture hall for public indecency. Then they’d call the police when we started doing it in the bushes outside.” It wasn’t their fault, the dorms had been too far away for them to wait.

The two’s mouths hung wide in astonished awe.

“And what happened?!” Manny asks urgently when Bernard returned to silence. A sad look flicked across the noirette’s face as he flicked his cigarette. The embers glowed brightly as he took a deep breath in, watching as it all escaped from his lungs a second later.

“We burnt out.” He explained simply, ignoring their disappointed and piteous looks. “It was around that time I started smoking a packet a day, and a bottle here and there.” He scoffed at the memory of his younger self laying hungover in his dorm, drinking himself senseless and chain smoking till they kicked him out of the university for missing classes and trashing his room. “Such an amateur.”

“Ooh Bernard.” Fran sighed sadly, forcing the Irishman to fight the urge to slap the sympathy off her face.

“It was fine, it was fine! I didn’t care- I don’t. He was OCD anyway. Never would have worked. Always tidying things...” He fiddled with his cigarette butt as they both looked at him and then one another, the room having gone uncomfortably quiet.

Bernard took another long drag from what was left of his fag before putting it out and standing suddenly.

“I’m going to bed.” He announced, grabbing the rest of the wine and taking it with him as he disappeared behind the curtains.

Fran and Manny shared another empathetic look, sighing to themselves and chatting in hushed tones for the rest of the night.

 

§

 

Bernard sat slouched in his chair with his usual hangover and a half-smoked fag in his mouth the next day. He had awoken later than usual, so Manny had opened the shop and let him be. They hadn’t really spoken beyond incomprehensible murmurs when needed, neither quite recovered from the night before.

The Irishman could barely contain a exasperated ‘ _ugh_ ’ as he heard the shop door open, the telltale sound of a _customer_ entering. Honestly, who bought books on a Wednesday? Weren’t they all at work or humping or whatever. He’d heard Wednesday was hump day, and personally he’d much rather be humping right about now.

Bernard briefly flicked his eyes up towards the door from his open book (which he wasn’t having much luck reading) and instantly regretted it.

There at the front of the shop stood _Thomas_ , the man looking straight at him with those piercing emerald eyes and smiling softly.

Bernard’s cigarette fell from his mouth onto his desk, the noirette quickly coming to his senses and erratically stubbing it out as the other made his way _towards_ the front desk. _God dammit! Why did he allow Manny toilet breaks!?_

“I need to return this.” Bernard swallowed at the sound of the other’s familiar, smooth voice. It vibrated in his ears and travelled straight down his spine, making him suppress a shiver.

The shop owner cleared his throat and did his best to speak clearly despite the tightness of his throat.

“Reason for return?” Bernard asked, keeping his gaze down and trying desperately to stay professional even though his heart was thumping in his ears.

“I already have it.”

“Then why did you buy it?” He tried to sass the other but it didn’t quite come out right.

“Because I wanted to come back and see you.” His mouth was now very, very dry “I was in town and heard you lived nearby. When you ran off yesterday I didn’t get to say hi so I thought it would be a good enough excuse to drop in.” The man answered honestly, sounding slightly nervous himself.

Bernard looked to his wine glass to quench his thirst but found it empty. No matter, his hands were shaking like crazy anyway, he probably wouldn’t have been able to pick it up.

“Our return policy doesn’t cover pretense-mmph!”

His sass was rudely interrupted by the other suddenly diving down and snogging him, his eyes flying wide at the unexpected kiss. It was only a second they were touching lip to lip and already he could feel it again, that fire in his belly he hadn’t felt since his youth. A desperate and greedy intoxicating lust.

Thomas was sucking his tongue clear out of his mouth, the taste of expensive cigarettes overwhelming Bernard’s senses. Before he knew it his eyes had fallen shut, and his tongue was aggressively battling Tom’s as he grabbed the Englishman’s face and kissed him back as hard as he could.

Things began flying off the desk, Bernard having knocked them off as he crawled up onto the desk in and attempt to get closer, the two urgently groping and tugging at one another like lovers reunited after war. Thomas squeezed his arse hard in one hand, sweeping the rest of the crap accumulated on the desk aside with the other as he desperately tried to bring their bodies together.

Bernard was already pulling at the other’s coat, wanting, _needing_ to feel their skin press together once again. He was burning inside. It felt like the feeling was going to eat him alive if he didn’t get relief as they tore and bit and _devoured_ one another.

Neither noticed as Manny returned, staring at the two violently grabbing at one another like animals in battle. It took him a moment to recover from shock and hurry back out to give them some privacy.

A second later he rushed straight back in, covering the side of his vision with his hand and trying hard as he could to block out the obscene noises as he hurried to lock the shop door. He shut the curtains well as he could so no one could see inside and ran back over in order to hide in his room and call Fran as the two tumbled to the floor behind the desk, a mess of tangled limbs as they began tearing off each other’s clothes.

Unable to get past them Manny fretted about a moment before running back over to the front door, unlocking it, and then re-locking it once he was safely on the other side, deciding he’d go over and pay Fran a visit instead.

Meanwhile Bernard shoved all the books on the floor digging into his back aside, laying back with his legs wide in invitation as the other descended down on him, his head back baying a sultry moan as his neck was sucked savagely.

Tom licked and bit at his collar, getting both their pants down just enough that he could grind his hips down on the other, the disaster of a human beneath him turning to a pleasured puddle.

Like two mangy cats in heat they cried out and humped desperately, losing count of how many times and how many surfaces they made love on before they finally passed out from exhaustion.

 

§

 

Bernard awoke alone on his terrible excuse for a bed, his muscles so lax and sore it was as though he were almost dead. His lips felt bruised and swollen, and his lower body so tired after so many leg shaking orgasms he didn’t think he’d be able to stand even if he tried.

The drunk sighed blissfully, humming gleefully to himself as he looked over to the bedside table for his cigarettes. Instead his eyes caught sight of a small note, one of Tom’s good cigarettes sitting atop.

Bernard groaned as he reached for the two, feeling around the sheets for wherever he’d left his lighter as he read the note.

_I’ll see you soon, my fire._

The Irishman couldn’t help a scoff. Bloody disgusting romantic. Still, it made his heart warm none the less as he lit the cigarette and lay back, taking a deep breath in and tasting the other as though he were right there with him. Bernard smiled as he sighed, the most content he’d felt in years.

Perhaps they hadn’t burnt out just yet.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Bernard panted in gasps as Thomas rolled off him, his lover’s breathing just as erratic and laboured as his. It took a long moment before the lawyer found the strength to move again, reaching bonelessly for the pack of expensive cigarettes and lighter on the nightstand.

The Irishman hummed appreciatively as a lit fag was slipped between his lips, the two laying back completely blissed out as they delighted in their usual after sex smoking ritual. No one spoke, both content to communicate in puffs of nicotine and tar.

Slowly the trance faded and Tom became painfully aware of the fact he was laying in a pig sty. Thankfully the smell of sex and cigarettes masked anything else, as he’d really rather not have a clue as to what was growing in the corner, or the nature of the sludge under the bedside table.

Bernard himself was a mess too, though less so than when he’d first seen him again through the bookshop window. He’d only been passing by after visiting a friend who lived in the area when he’d noted the literature emporium. As a lover of books he had considered going in before he’d spotted the man reclined behind the counter. A nagging sense of familiarity had set him in place a moment before realisation set him reeling.

The Irishman looked like he’d been living off nothing but nicotine and alcohol, which as it turned out wasn’t too far from the truth. He was a disgusting unwashed disaster, and yet somehow the Englishman couldn’t help the way his heart had thudded at seeing him for the first time after so long apart.

He’d continued walking on, only to find himself wandering in the next day after a sleepless night.

He still wasn’t quite sure how the other had gone from the absolute _babe_ he had been in his younger years to what he was now, swigging wine straight from the bottle at nine am.

“Oh love, what happened to you? You look like a train wreck.” Thomas admitted, looking at the half empty wine bottle with thinly veiled concern.

“Well sorry if I couldn’t be stuffed keeping up my looks after you viciously shattered my self esteem.” Bernard bit back, fag between his teeth.

“I did my best to end things painlessly.” The lawyer defended apologetically.

“Ah yes well I didn’t feel any pain at all when you said you weren’t attracted to me anymore.” Came the Irishman’s sarcastic reply.

“It was the only excuse I could think of!” Bernard pointedly ignored him, turning over on his side to face away from the other. Thomas sighed and shifted closer, leaning his jaw on Bernard’s shoulder. “I didn’t want to end things, you’ll always be attractive to me, even like this.” He teased, the Irishman scoffing and taking another long drag. Tom frowned as he still refused to look at him, staring down at the sheets in a depressed fashion.

The Englishman sighed. He supposed he was long overdue an explication for his actions as an adolescent.

“My parent’s found out after we got arrested.” Stupid public indecency laws. “They gave me the choice of either breaking it off with you or getting cut off. I chose money over you, and I’ve regretted it every day since.” He was exaggerating of course, he wasn’t unhealthily infatuated with the other. “I’m so sorry.” He apologised between kisses up the other’s neck.

Bernard seemed to consider this a moment, humming as lips trailed up to his jaw.

“I’ll forgive you if you take me out and buy me the most expensive wine on the list with the money you gave me up for.” Thomas grinned.

“Deal.”

They kissed deeply, the lawyer’s tongue sliding over his teeth. Tom’s face scrunched up and he pulled away suddenly, looking at the other unsure. “When was the last time you brushed your teeth?” He almost didn’t want to know the answer, though Bernard’s shrug was _far_ from comforting.

The shop owner took another swig of wine to clean his mouth as the other stared at him in disbelief, certain the taste of smoke and alcohol would hide anything else.

“God you’re still such a disgusting slob.”

“If I weren’t I wouldn’t let you do half the filthy things you do to me.” He pointed out, Thomas raising his brow back at him.

“Filthy? Oh you want filthy huh?” A dirty smile spread across his face, and in that moment Bernard _knew_ he was in for some fucked up karma suitra shit.

 

§EXTRA§

 

After they lay pressed together, content and exhausted. Thomas ran his fingers lazily through the other’s greasy hair, his face scrunching up in befuddlement. He looked at the item he had pulled from the base of the other’s skull in confusion.

“Are these... mushrooms in your hair?”

“Mmm.” A look of horror crossed the Englishman’s face before his expression hardened.

“That’s disgusting. Get in the shower.”

“No.” Bernard replied defiantly, rolling over as he was glared down at.

The shop owner cried out as he was unexpectedly pushed from the mattress onto the floor before being manhandled up onto his feet, forced butt naked out the door towards the bathroom.

“Hey! No! See now- now unrealistic standards of hygiene like this are why I stopped being gay!”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked! Remember to Kudos :)


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